we will be going nowhere soon

this is your life
and it's ending
one second at a time.

i really didn't do anything today
which kind of makes me sad
but at the same time,
i don't mind so much.

i dealt with a lot of insurance stuff today
the allstate people are really nice.
i really miss my car though :(
and i still feel awful about the accident.
i wish i could just put it out of my mind
but oh well.
life just has it's little upsies i guess :(


driving my car is probably going to be very scary after this.
ugh especially changing lanes on the freeway.
i'm so scared of the freeway now.
i guess i just have to be really extra super cautious next time.

...i don't mean to digress but...
oh lord
i really miss danny.
i hate to admit it because sometimes i wish i didn't miss him
but i really really want to go back to him
only because i know what to expect in that "relationship".
i miss his love and i miss him as a person
i miss his body and the nights we used to spend
and i don't want to settle for anything else right now.

letting go is ridiculously difficult and draining :(
i wish i didn't have to do it
but it's not about what i want anymore.
it's about what i need to do to be happy.

"your eyes must do some raining if you're ever going to grow"




toodle oooh